Oldest You've Ever Been

By Ashton Hope

you’re quite a perfectionist, 

did you know?

the way you tear up the page

when the line of a ‘p’ is extended in the wrong direction

and then use a ruler

and divide the sheet with such precision

that anyone who you allowed to look into the diary

would think you don’t control over your emotions.

you’re quite a pessimist,

did you know?

the way you refuse to believe

when he says he’ll get you out and it’ll all be alright

just because you have no faith

in yourself or in anyone cause you were there for the nights

you wailed and painted yourself sapphire,

just for no one to come and help you; you proved yourself right.

you’re quite a psychologist,

did you know?

the way the words slip softly

and find cracks in the mind of the fragile other,

when no one else could breach the walls,

you somehow did and restored them to jupiter,

cause no matter the situation

you’ll always have the experience to answer.

what? 

you really didn’t think i’d leave you alone, did you?

i’ve been watching you, my love,

and you bet I'm gonna continue to.

you turned sixteen last month,

and my heart swells with a pride beyond measure,

cause even though what i did,

you’ve found a way to treasure

that you’re the oldest you’ve ever been,

but i’ve been the oldest I'll ever be.

By Ashton Hope