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Is It The Death You Desire

Noted Nest

By Yogisha Rani


I hated to love life.

Cuz it scared me, 

That I will be afraid of death.

I hated making attachments

Cuz they made me afraid of leaving them behind

Cuz, they made me not want to die.

 Its not the death that scared me.

Its the fear of death, that did.

Its that I m afraid of fearing death

Cuz I seem to have love her so

That when she finally comes with open arms

I m afraid I won’t want to leave.


Maybe I was wrong.

Maybe I can just love life

And not deny death when she is at the door

Maybe I can invite her in and tell her my stories with life

Maybe its the life I feared, feared to get too attached

Feared at the end it will hurt me.

But oh.

Maybe I was wrong.

Cuz maybe it will hurt more to fear it,

Than to love it.

Maybe its just the way of the universe

And will I be able to look death in the eyes

If I never so much so looked at her best friend.


Maybe it will be okay to let myself swim with life

With all her waves and tides, and the mysteries she hides

Even with the storms, fighting till the endless

To let myself drown, or stay afloat to see another peaceful sky

Maybe I should meet other boats, build a ship together

Maybe I should sail in the sinking sun

Till death pulls me up at the shore

Or lifts me from the bed of the ocean.


Maybe I should let myself love life

So I have stories to tell death.

To make her smile.


By Yogisha Rani

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