I Tell Myself

By Ibthisam I

Admiring beautiful faces as I’m scrolling

Imagining beautiful faces as I’m toiling

Beauty is everywhere my eyes can reach

“Beauty doesn’t matter,” is what they preach

“Beauty doesn’t matter,” I tell myself.

I glance at myself in the mirror

“Oh my!” I’m such a horror

I shift my eyes and look away

Unable to look at me anyway

“Beauty doesn’t matter,” I tell myself.

A body figure, not so nice

Hairy legs and blubbery thighs

Strawberry skin and dark spots

I try to silence my shady thoughts

“Beauty doesn’t matter,” I tell myself.

Tummy rolls invaded by a stretch mark

I look up to blackheads and lips dark

Blunt nose and a double chin

Through my tears, I attempt an ugly grin

“Beauty doesn’t matter,” I tell myself.

Quick glances and quicker remarks, I recall

“All plumpy plumpy you’ve become” they laughed

“Your weight is showing in that dress” she distressed

“You’re round like a watermelon, roll to me” he mocked

“Careful with that ice cream, that belly will bloom” he chortled

“Beauty is pain,” I starve myself.

By Ibthisam I